"Alone in Reality"

When the pain, in my body and mind,

is excruciating;

when multiple fears

overwhelm me,

and the world is

rapidly closing in –

that’s when I thought

the people

who told me they cared

would be there.

In my time of need.   

Yet, most disappear. 

They run from my fear,

won’t stay through my tears. 

What does that mean?  Signify?

That none of them ever cared?

I am alone and abandoned:

That is my

reality.

"They Never See"

I think it’s sad, what they can never see.

Silence - its own screaming testimony –

shows ultimately, what they think of me. 

I care until there’s nothing left,

and then –

maybe some drama; or, perhaps –

just to drift

slowly

apart.

Things turn out as they do: That’s destiny. 

I still think it’s sad

that they never can see,

or maybe just don’t care

that they are losing me. 

"IRL"

Do I exist at all?

All seems unreal - surreal.

Of course, no-one can ever know

exactly how another feels.

Is anyone or anything

tangible - for real?

Am I real?

Do I exist at all?

"Becomes Another Day"

Hold on, just one more moment,

which becomes another day.

The subtle shades of sadness sing

deceptively sweet melodies. Hope fades,

like a repeating chorus line.

Still, we hold on

just one more moment,

which becomes

another day.

"Barriers"

these barriers, you'll never touch or see

they're real - they are a part of me

and the end results - visible enough

to make a cruel world reject me

"So-Called 'Known' Before"

How can I ever know for sure

what I have so-called "known" before,

that people wouldn't leave?

I thought I knew the score

so many times - but I was wrong -

the lyrics from another song.

My mind knows - not my heart.

I've been this way for far too long.

I want to let go of my fears,

but part of me never will.

It's tearing me apart, but it's true:

I can't trust anyone.

"Never Came Close"

I sense an ending in the air

as yet - not clearly defined

but there


never came close

to closeness for me

fragments of reality

shower

my shattering heart

how can this

be right

dreams like melting ice

within my mind


how do I hold on

yet - how

do I let go